Regulus felt colder and colder even as the summer days grew long and stifling. His home was a frigid wasteland of stilted duty, countless meetings, violent missions and suffocating expectation. A few days after the holidays began, he finally turned seventeen, and his parents marked the occasion with a long family dinner. He suffered through it, forcing himself to behave as was expected of him.

Late in the night, an owl tapped on his window. It bore a postcard with a picture of a coastal vista and writing that read a generic ‘Spain’. The only thing on the back was a drawing of a starburst. It was the perfect gift. He knew she was safe and clever enough not to write a message anyone else would understand.

That night, he went to sleep imagining sweet-smelling hair and soft skin, the postcard tucked under his pillow.

***

Being of age meant a certain amount of freedom. He could apparate anywhere on his own now, but it also meant he was expected to carry out tasks for the Dark Lord. 

Barty was enthusiastic about the unpleasant intimidation tactics they had to employ against anyone Voldemort found lacking, while Regulus avoided harming anyone. When he was sure no one would witness him, he moved people out of the line of fire. It all still scraped against his soul, regardless of anything he did or didn’t do.

Receiving his Hogwarts letter was the one pleasant surprise of the summer holiday— he’d been offered the position as Head Boy. 

He took it to his mother, and she was proud. She went herself to ask Voldemort to allow him back to school so he could assert control through the title. Everyone, including the Dark Lord, was convinced it was necessary for him to return, especially since his counterpart would be a filthy Mudblood, Wendy Clark. It was a slight that could not go unpunished.

Regulus was furious. Surely Dumbledore knew how large a target this painted on her. The message it sent to pair them together was probably exactly what the old fool wanted: to provoke Voldemort further. Once he was alone, Regulus vowed that he would do anything in his limited power to stop any of them getting anywhere near her.

***

A few days later, Barty stopped by and gleefully told him that his ‘gift’ was ready. That night, they donned their masks and Barty side-alonged him to an unremarkable Muggle street, making his way towards a modest brick house with a blue front door. Regulus followed apprehensively. There were flower boxes on the windows in desperate need of watering. Anguish struck him as his wandlight illuminated lettering on the plaque by the door.

‘Clark’

Barty unlocked the door and sauntered inside. Regulus swallowed his terror and followed. 

The house was quiet but felt lived in, with shoes by the door. He spotted odd frozen pictures on the mantel: a smiling family, a baby and a toddler with mops of brown hair, the smiling young man from the station wearing a numbered jersey and holding what looked like a squashed quaffle, and another of a young Wendy wearing a yellow dress and a toothy smile. His heart thumped uncomfortably. Then, from upstairs, came a thud and a curse. Barty reappeared, stomping down the stairs.

‘No one is fucking here. Sorry, mate,’ Barty said, sounding very disappointed and joining him in the living room. ‘I was hoping the uptight bitch would be here with her filthy family. We could have given them a right scare.’

Regulus forced himself to look bored, reigned in his urge to hex Barty and focused on pushing out a dry response.

‘Well, if you had mentioned it, I would have told you I heard her telling that faggot Barley at the last prefect meeting that she was away all summer with said filthy family,’ Regulus drawled, hoping he was being convincing. Relief hit him when Barty laughed.

‘Then it wouldn’t have been a surprise! I’m shocked they can afford it, living in this hovel,’ Barty sneered, knocking the baby picture to the floor where it smashed. Regulus felt a sharp pang in his stomach. 

Barty then got a wild glint in his eye and took out his wand. ‘We can still have some fun, though.’

None of it was fun, Barty laughed maniacally as he shattered precious memories and obliterated furniture. Regulus’s chest tightened with each curse and each fake laugh, until it felt as though something in him was breaking too. By the time they left, everything in the house was torn apart.

Only once he was alone, locked in his bedroom, could he break. Hands shaking, he took out the postcard and the now battered copy of ‘Peter Pan’ from their hiding spot in the warded false bottom of his school trunk and held them until his breathing evened out.

***

Every torturous day brought him closer to seeing her again. 

He read as much as he could in the family library about a way to break the magic of the mark, all while trying not to draw attention or lose his head to the memory of what happened in that library.

It took Regulus an agonising week to find time to slip away and return to her home.

He meticulously mended everything room by room and set the house back to the way it had been before. He lingered in what he knew had to be Wendy’s room, where it was warm like her and full of books and pictures hung on every spare bit of wall. The ache of missing her was strongest there. Then he constructed the best wards he could. He made sure Barty would never find the house again and watered the flowers before he left.

***

‘You’ve been distracted, Regulus,’ his mother said over dinner. ‘Bella mentioned you left the meeting early the other night.’

Only his father and mother were present. Regulus should have calculated that would mean an attack. He kept his face neutral as he spiralled internally. The meeting she was referring to was only an excuse for Bella and her more barbaric friends to Muggle hunt. Regulus had been horrified by what he had seen.

‘You know what she’s like, Mother. I don’t relish drawn-out torture. Threats are more than enough to spread power through fear,’ he said, affecting an air of boredom.

‘That’s what I’ve been saying, darling,’ his father spoke up, surprising Regulus a little. ‘All of this sadism is unrefined.’

His mother shot her husband a hostile glare.

‘Even that Crouch boy was there until the end. And his father has yet to commit one way or the other,’ hissed Walburga, gaze fixed on Orion. ‘I will not have people thinking our son is weak.’ Then something unspoken passed between them. His father sighed, left the table, and then the room, without glancing at Regulus again.

Left alone with his mother, Regulus tried not to panic. He had realised far too late how much Sirius had shielded him from her when they were young. It wasn’t until Sirius went away to Hogwarts that miserable year he was left alone at home that he learned what it was like to face the full breadth of her punishments. He was not a trembling child anymore, though and readied himself.

Her claws slashed into his mind. There was no point trying to force her out; that would only mean physical torture and then this again. He allowed her to see the chess game. He had to think quickly of something to offer her. He was too slow.

The memory of Sirius confronting him near the library was painfully pulled forward. She watched it several times, pausing on Sirius’ anguished face as he grabbed Regulus’ arm and asked if it was true, and then on Lupin leading him away. 

There was nothing after that except a false memory of him walking calmly to the library. All memories associated with Wendy were carefully buried where she would never be found.

Regulus felt her withdraw and the room spun slightly. He took in gulps of air and blinked the tears of pain from his eyes as his mother came into focus. She was studying him with a strange expression he couldn’t read in his current state.

‘Are you in contact with him?’ she asked accusatorily.

‘No,’ choked Regulus. ‘That was the last conversation we had.’

‘Why did you not tell me about this when it happened?’ she said, face still unreadable.

‘There was nothing to tell. He left me alone after that.’ he rasped, taking in another gulp of air.

She did not look convinced. 

He was ready this time when she sank back into his mind. Sirius walking past him like he was a stranger. Sirius’ gaze passing over him with cool indifference in the Great Hall.

Then something changed. Regulus felt as though he was on fire. Every cell in his body was screaming. His mind became chaotic, jumbled, disorganised in a way that wasn’t normal. The chess pieces tumbled and smashed. He couldn’t stop the image of Sirius and Lupin embracing from surfacing. Blind panic joined the searing pain until a voice cut off the whole thing.

‘Enough.’ His father’s voice was a command. Reality crashed into Regulus. He was on the carpet by the dining table. Throat raw. Had he been screaming? His whole body ached, his shoulder throbbing from where it had hit the floor. He saw his mother standing over him, wand in hand. ‘I said that is enough, Walburga.’

His mother took one last disdainful look at Regulus on the floor and then stalked out of the room, his father following. Regulus stayed where he was, breathless and feeling utterly pathetic.

After a few long cycles of breathing, Kreacher slipped into the room to fuss over him tearfully.

‘Kreacher will help the young master. Come along, you are needing rest.’

The elf helped him stumble upstairs to his bedroom and helped him get ready for bed. He popped back in with a pain potion that Regulus gratefully took, and fell into a deep sleep.

***

The remaining weeks of the summer were spent in daily interrogations from his mother. She dug into him, searching for anything more he had not shared with her. Wendy was buried so deep now he could not recall what she looked like when he tried. Every time he reached for a memory of her, all he found was a shapeless blur, a dull ache where her face and voice used to be. He had locked those parts of him in a room and lost the key. It was better that way, but he started to forget why. So he stopped trying.

Sometimes he would find himself staring at his own hands and forgetting for a moment what they were meant to do. Sometimes whole afternoons would vanish, and he would not remember how he spent them, unable to tell if he had even spoken a word. 

His mind felt like it had been scrubbed raw. The colours and sounds of the world muted until everything was grey and muffled, as if he were underwater.

‘What is he?’ his mother spat after watching the memory of Sirius again.

‘Nothing.’

‘Good. What else?’

‘A disgrace.’

‘And?’

‘Filthy. Tainted. Wrong.’

‘Very good.’

It was like this every day.

Regulus could feel himself slipping away. It was pointless to resist, so he let himself be pulled under.

***

He had been hoping Barty would forgo Hogwarts in favour of running about causing mayhem, but of course he would have to deal with his reckless friend at school as well.

‘We’re going to be Kings Reg!’ Barty declared as he joined him in the compartment Regulus had claimed.

‘I think you’ll find that will be me,’ Regulus drawled, pinning his head boy badge to his robes. ‘I have to go and meet with the Mudblood. Don’t embarrass me while I’m gone.’

‘Make sure she knows how it’s going to be and who’s in charge!’ laughed Barty, bowing mockingly.

‘Leave it to me,’ Regulus said as menacingly as he could muster. As he left the compartment, the unpleasantness of that exchange faded, replaced by a buzzing excitement that was quickly tempered by anxiety and involuntary disgust. He did not remember why he was nervous about seeing her. She was filth. He had to be rid of her to be who he was meant to be. He had to drive her from the castle. That was the plan. He couldn’t be weak like Sirius.

Hands slick with sweat, he slid open the door to the Prefect compartment. It was more spacious than the rest, with room for all the Prefects to sit comfortably for their meetings. Wendy was already there, looking out the window. She turned to him, and he was struck by how beautiful she looked. Something in his mind rattled violently. Her skin and hair were kissed with the sun. Somehow, she had more freckles than he remembered, and her hair was streaked with lighter browns. She was a goddess of summertime. Her face broke out in a wide smile.

‘Hi Reggie,’ she breathed. The rattling in his mind stopped with a hard crack, and everything rushed back to him. Her softness and warmth. The ache of being away from her. With a flick of his wand, the door locked, and the curtains snapped shut. He moved to her like a predator, took her in his arms and crashed his mouth onto hers. She returned the kiss with equal fervour, wrapping her arms around him and dragging her nails along the nape of his neck. It was confusing to him why he had done this, but he didn’t want to stop.

He had been a fathomless void before this moment. 

She was real, solid and warm in his arms. Each brush of her tongue on his brought feeling back into the part of him that had turned cold. He made a pitiful noise as she pulled back.

‘Regulus, what’s wrong?’ she asked, her hands moving to his face. He was confused to find he’d been crying.

‘Fuck, sorry,’ he choked, hastily wiping his face. She helped with gentle swipes of her thumbs, eyes full of concern, and it only caused the clashing feelings of relief and revulsion to swirl wildly. ‘I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just really missed you.’

‘We can meet in the Room later, after the feast and talk about it, okay?’ she said so gently that his heart ached. ‘But right now we need to decide how we’re going to act. Are you going to be scary? If you do that, I can-’

He cut her off by bringing her to him in a crushing embrace.

‘I’m so fucking sorry we have to do this,’ he rasped.

‘It’s okay, we’ll be okay.’

‘It’s not. It’s really not.’

***

Regulus managed to pull it together with her help, to get through the meeting and Prefect assignments. He only had to stand beside her, looking the part of the perfectly terrible pureblood heir, while she dutifully handed out the schedules and instructions.

The feast dragged on and he scowled at Dumbledore's words about unity and fairness. Didn’t he know that the world would never be fair? Afterwards, it was a struggle to get away from Barty, who wanted to formulate plans to harass their fellow students.

Finally, he managed to slip away while Barty was lecturing new first-years about how things worked. Wendy was already waiting for him with her outer robes discarded. His breath caught as she looked up from her book and smiled.

She shifted to make room for him, and he joined her. It was like no time had passed since the last time they were here. Tucked into his side, she told him all about her summer adventures. He listened closely, imagining her with the wind in her hair and the sun on her face.

‘Want to tell me why your magic was all over my house?’ she asked, turning her face to his; dread curdled in his stomach.

‘When we were appointed, there was talk… I wanted to make sure no one could find you,’ he said, hating himself for lying. He didn’t want to frighten her, but he was also ashamed of the part he’d played.

‘My hero,’ she said, smiling and leaning in to kiss him. He met her even though he didn’t deserve it. He kept kissing her so he wouldn’t have to talk about his summer with her.

***

He felt revolted with himself as he walked around the castle as if he owned it. Barty and a stocky fifth year named Dolohov flanked him most of the time. Everyone was afraid of them. Barty relished the torment of anyone who even chanced a glance at them.

A different sort of revulsion haunted him in private. After his secret meetings with Wendy, he fisted his cock alone in his bed with the curtains drawn. She had let him touch her in places other boys whispered or boasted about. And she had touched him in return. He craved more but let her set the pace.

He hated himself for wanting her but he wanted her all the same. It was meant to be wrong, but she was so good and kind and beautiful. It didn’t make any sense. He let the memory of her soft skin and sweet smell override his mother's harsh voice as he stroked himself.

Each time he finished, he knew he was a traitor.

***

‘What are you? Going soft?’ Barty taunted him again after Regulus had let a couple of second-year Hufflepuffs by them without incident. He was growing weary of Barty’s constant desire to attack anyone within range of them.

‘I’m Head Boy. I am too visible.’ Regulus responded tiredly.

‘Head Bender more like!’ Barty laughed.

‘The whole point,’ Regulus said as if explaining to an unruly child, ‘of my return was to spread fear and recruit for the Dark Lord. To be subtle about it and not draw unwanted attention from the professors.’

‘Boring!’ Barty groaned and then blew an undignified raspberry. Regulus drew himself up to full height and fixed a threatening air around himself.

‘Behave yourself and do as you are told. Any deviation from the plan I’ve set out will be reported to him. And that is something you do not want.’ Regulus said menacingly. Only threats would work on Barty.

‘Fine,’ Barty sighed. ‘I’ll see you at lunch.’

Regulus watched him walk away with a growing feeling that Barty’s restlessness would eventually spill over.

***

Wendy was very focused on their final examinations. When they weren’t dealing with their head duties, they were studying for the NEWTs in the Room. Regulus didn’t even know if he’d make it at Hogwarts until then, but he indulged her mostly because he got to watch her bent over books and parchment, biting her full lips with the cutest furrow in her brow.

He had a lot to make up for after the horrible birthday she’d had the previous year. 

His planning began in October. 

This year her birthday fell on a Sunday, so he made sure to reserve her time the Saturday night beforehand.

He spent most of that Saturday transforming the room into the perfect cosy space for them to spend the evening. The Room was lit by candlelight and a merry fire in the grate. Cushions and blankets covered every surface of the floor, save the space in the centre, which was laid with food, drinks and a pile of presents.

Her presents had been more of a challenge. He settled on no less than seven books and a pair of earrings to match her necklace.

Dressed in a more relaxed house robe, he made sure everything was perfect multiple times and anxiously waited for her to arrive.

***

Wendy arrived wearing a Muggle dress beneath her robes, which hit above the knee. Regulus had to make a concerted effort to look at her face and not the expanse of leg on display.

‘You did all this?’ she asked, looking around with a growing smile. ‘I guess we aren’t studying then.’ She discarded her bag and robes by the door and sat near the picnic.

‘You’re not allowed to study on your birthday,’ he said, joining her with his nerves crackling.

‘My birthday is tomorrow,’ she said, smiling at him. She looked so beautiful that his chest ached.

‘Well then I guess you can’t have your presents then,’ he teased, pushing the pile to her. He watched her smile grow.

‘All of these? Reggie, this is too much,’ she said, blush colouring her cheeks. He reached out and touched one.

‘Nothing is too much for you.’

He was pleased that she liked all of her gifts. She put the earrings on immediately and gushed about them, peppering him with kisses.

After they ate, she was in his lap, skirt pushed up, kissing him languidly. His heart almost stopped when her hands slipped under his shirt.

‘Is that okay?’ she asked breathlessly between kisses. All he could do was nod and fumble to pull his shirt over his head. He stifled a groan when her hands began roaming around his bare chest. He responded by pushing her dress up to her waist.

They had never been this far before, and he was nervous, desperate to see more of her, but nervous. It all happened like moving through water. 

Slowly they bared themselves. She was left in only the necklace and earrings that he’d given her. Something possessively primal roared in his chest. He murmured gasping praises of her, his heart pumping against his ribs.

He’d touched her breasts under her clothes before, but seeing them at the same time as feeling the soft flesh beneath his calloused hands was an entirely different experience.

He lay her down on the cushions and inhaled sharply at how exquisite she was. Hovering over her, he took in her silken curls and smooth skin in awe. She smiled bashfully at him and trailed her fingers up his arms. He’d taken to covering his mark with a bandage and was glad for it at this moment.

‘Are you sure?’ he whispered, hoping she would say yes.

‘I’m sure. I want it to be you.’

That was all he needed. He kissed her, moving his mouth down along her jaw and neck, between her breasts, pausing to lap at the velvety flesh of them. When he swirled his tongue around one of the taut nubs, he was rewarded with her mewl and the arch of her back.

He was unbearably hard. It pressed against the inside of her thigh. He reached down and pressed his fingers into her slick heat. He already knew the way to do it, to make her breathing turn ragged. Her fingers gripped his hair and dug into his back before that hand slid down between his legs.

He couldn’t hold back his groan this time.

‘Wendy, if you keep doing that, I won’t last,’ he said huskily. She smiled cheekily at him and the sight made his dick pulse.

‘I’m ready,’ she whispered. He took a steadying breath, moved his hands to her hips, and her hands moved to his. He lined himself up and brushed his nose on hers.

Looking into her eyes, he slowly pressed forward. It was like nothing he had ever felt before. She was hot and tight around him and all thoughts left his mind except her.

He watched her lips part in a silent gasp. When he met the smallest resistance, he paused. She dug her fingers in and urged him in all the way. She inhaled sharply, squeezing her eyes shut, and he moved his hands to her face—his brave, beautiful lion.

‘I love you,’ he blurted out, instantly regretting it. Her eyes popped open again, and he braced for her to push him away. But she smiled.

‘Yeah?’ she whispered. He nodded quickly, desperate for friction but waiting for her to adjust. ‘Well, I love you too.’

‘Can I?’ he said, rocking his hips forward slightly and she gasped.

‘Go slow, okay?’

Slow. He could do slow.

Carefully, they found a rhythm together. His face ached from smiling and laughing between kisses. The sounds she was making were sweet music in the sanctuary of their private space. He was enthralled with the way she felt beneath him and the way her body opened for him.

He did not know how he managed to last as long as he did, but the moment she tilted her ruinous hips forward, he was done for. He spilt inside her and moaned her name. Quickly, he buried his face in the curve of her neck and panted.

Her gentle hands stroked his back, and he melted against her.

‘I think I understand what all the fuss is about,’ she said softly in his ear. He huffed a laugh and lifted his head to kiss her.

‘Me too,’ he murmured against her lips.

***

In the coming weeks, they could barely keep their hands off each other. Every night they didn’t spend with each other in the Room was a wasted one in his mind. His obsession with her reached a fever pitch. He even risked going down on her in the small office they shared for writing their reports and thought about the way she tasted for days afterwards.

Regulus was finally seeing clearly. Being with Wendy in that way had shaken off the last remnants of his Mother’s efforts to poison his mind. He felt like he could finally breathe. 

Barty had become a problem—he started acting out. 

‘Where do you think a filthy mudblood like her got those fancy-looking jewels in her ears?’ Barty asked lazily. They were leaning on the fountain in the Transfiguration courtyard before class. Wendy was passing them, deep in cheerful conversation with Christopher Barley. Regulus might have been jealous, except everyone knew Barley was gay. ‘Oi! Clark!’

Wendy paused and looked over.

‘Everything alright, Wendy?’ Barley asked her.

‘Fine, Chris, you go on. I’ll catch up,’ she said, moving to face them. Barley hesitated and then shuffled away. ‘What?’ she spat at them, sticking her nose in the air. Regulus wanted to kiss her for her bravery.

‘Just wondering if you liked our gift,’ Barty snickered with barely contained glee. Regulus felt a stab of panic. Wendy frowned, glancing at Regulus in question. ‘I’d say I was sorry about that dump you call a house, but I’m not.’

‘Whatever this is, I don’t have time for it,’ she said, turning and striding away. Barty was laughing now.

‘You didn’t tell her?’ he asked between chuckles.

‘No,’ Regulus ground out. ‘It’s more frightening that she doesn’t know who did it, you idiot.’

‘Whoops,’ Barty said, shrugging delightedly.

Regulus was starting to think of ways he could kill him, make it look like an accident.

***

He only managed to avoid Wendy for one day. She cornered him in the Head Boy and Girl office after lunch the following day.

‘What was Crouch talking about?’ she said with no preamble as soon as the door closed behind her. She crossed her arms over her chest, looking formidable. Regulus cringed.

‘In the summer, he found your house. He took me there. He, we destroyed it,’ he said quietly.

‘It was fine when I went there,’ she said, frowning.

‘I went back and fixed it. I didn’t want you to know,’ he explained quickly.

‘You-’ she started, but the door creaked open, and Barley poked his head in.

‘Coming, Wendy?’ he asked carefully, glancing warily at Regulus.

‘Yes. See that those reports are filed, Black,’ she said sternly, turning on her heel to leave with the other boy.

Regulus wanted to sink into the floor.

***

She didn’t meet him for rounds.

She had stopped coming to the Room in the evenings.

Regulus felt his lungs constricting smaller and smaller every day she didn’t speak to him.

His thoughts became erratic and disjointed. 

Then it was winter break. He was forced to go home to show face to the Dark Lord and report on his progress. He saw Wendy being picked up from King's Cross by James Potter and a man who could only be his father.

It was agony not knowing where she would be or where to send her Christmas gift.

Maybe she didn’t want it.

Maybe she didn’t want him anymore.

Without her, he felt cold again.

He was nothing.

He had to get her back.

He only had to focus on getting through the holiday, and then he could make it up to her.

***

Everyone seemed to be in attendance at the Black Family Manor for the meeting with the Dark Lord. Bella and her creepy husband, Narcissa, and her more calculating one, Snape, for some reason, and several of his father's friends: Nott, Flint, Avery and Carrow.

Regulus had not seen his cousin Narcissa since her wedding. He was almost glad to see her before he remembered he was a traitor now. She had protected him in the past, guided him while she’d still been at school with him, but he didn’t think she would be forgiving if she knew how far he had strayed.

He dutifully gave his report, skipping over Barty’s defiance, and mentioning the names of the younger boys who had potential. Voldemort seemed pleased with him and instructed him to return and continue. Regulus could have groaned with relief.

After the meeting, he was exhausted from pretending to be the perfect heir. He shut himself in his room and tried to relax.

He was startled by a soft knock. Opening the door, he found Narcissa hovering in the hallway.

‘Can we speak? Lucius is distracted talking to Bella, but I don’t know for how long,’ she said urgently. He considered turning her away, but his curiosity won out. He let her in and closed the door. She paced along the end of his bed and then turned to face him. ‘How are you? Really?’

‘What do you want, Cissy? I’m tired.’ Regulus sighed. He was in no mood for pleasantries.

‘Are you practising your shields?’ she asked, tapping her temple.

‘Always, why?’ he said, tilting his head in question.

‘It’s only that I learned something from Lucius recently, and you need to be careful,’ she whispered.

‘Just tell me,’ he said, annoyed now.

‘The Dark Lord,’ she whispered even more quietly. ‘The reason our family doesn’t fully trust him. He’s a half-blood.’

‘Why would we follow him then?’ Regulus asked sharply, irritation spiking. Narcissa shushed him, looking fearful, and stepped closer to whisper.

‘Because he cannot die.’

***

Regulus returned to school in the New Year full of a simmering rage. 

After Narcissa’s horrifying revelation, Regulus had spent the rest of the break looking up ways that it would even be possible not to die. He was certain it wasn’t a Philosopher's Stone, which left a small selection of dark methods for achieving that result. All of it disgusted him and added fuel to the fury building inside him.

His anger was directionless. He could be furious with his parents for being such awful hypocrites for following someone they should have held beneath them due to their beliefs. He could be mad at Barty for making his life so difficult. But he found his anger turning inwards. He hated himself more than ever before for being such a fool.

And she was still avoiding him.

He started tailing her surreptitiously.

He figured out when she would be alone in the Head’s office and entered to confront her. He wanted to demand that she speak to him, but the moment she looked up from her desk in surprise, it all melted away.

‘Please talk to me,’ he said pathetically.

‘Why should I?’ she said, standing and moving her papers to the side.

‘Because I love you,’ he said, taking a small step forward.

‘You lied to me,’ she said, scowling at him.

‘I know, I’m sorry!’ he said desperately. He stepped back as she raised her wand, but she only silenced the room.

‘You don’t understand!’ she shouted. ‘You hurt me! When have I ever done anything that would make you think you had to lie to me?’

He was struck dumb by this and the hurt etched in her face. She was absolutely right.

‘You haven’t.’ He said quietly.

‘Exactly. So if you’ll excuse me,’ she said pointedly, moving towards the door. Panic gripped him around the throat with a phantom hand. If he let her walk away, it would be the end of him. He blocked her exit and dropped to his knees before her.

‘Please, Wendy, I’m sorry,’ he choked, tears forming in his eyes. ‘I’m trying so fucking hard to keep it all away from you. I didn’t want to scare you. I didn’t want you to see what I have to be.’

He turned his face up to her and saw hers soften finally. He choked on a sob when her hands came to wipe his face. She lowered herself down to the floor with him and wrapped her arms around him.

‘I see you. You don’t have to keep things from me,’ she said softly. He pulled her to him and shook as he pressed his face into her hair.

‘I can’t breathe without you,’ he rasped, holding her tightly.

‘No more lying. You can’t lie to me again. Not ever.’

‘I swear I won’t. Please don’t go,’ he said, voice cracking.

‘I’m here,’ she said softly.

She carded her fingers through his hair until he calmed down. It felt like the first breath he’d taken in months.

***

A week later, they gave each other late Christmas presents. She gave him a wand holster for his arm, embossed with little stars, that only allowed him to draw his wand. He gave her a bracelet to match her other jewellery.

He then spent the evening worshipping her in every way he knew how to. Trying to show her how precious she was to him and how much he’d missed her; murmuring apologies and promises he swore to keep.

‘I wish we could stay in here forever,’ she said afterwards. They were naked and curled together in a nest of cushions.

‘Me too,’ he whispered, pulling her closer and kissing her hair.

***

Toward the end of January, Regulus was thoroughly distracted by Wendy again. He did not notice the escalation in Barty’s behaviour until it was too late.

Regulus was retiring to bed as a pretence for sneaking out once everyone was asleep to meet Wendy, when Barty flew into the dormitory and started shoving things into a bag.

Regulus stopped and questioned him. Barty explained hurriedly that he had been caught by Jones and Barley performing the Cruciatus Curse on someone.

‘On who?’ Regulus said sharply. 

‘No one important. That Clark bitch.’  Barty laughed as he shoved things into his bag. Regulus’ wand flew to his hand. He could kill him right here and now. Barty didn’t notice, only snapping his bag shut.

‘Sorry, mate, but I’m not having my wand snapped. I’ve got to go.’ Barty said, swinging the bag onto his back. ‘Give em hell, Reg.’

Regulus dumbly accepted the slap on the back and watched his problem run out the door.

A few moments later, Slughorn appeared, looking unusually grave, and instructed Regulus that he was required to see the Headmaster.

***

Dumbledore was waiting in the Slytherin common room. Regulus was confused by this choice. The Headmaster looked very out of place in vermillion robes amongst the greens of the room. He was peering through the frosty glass into the Black Lake with a serene look on his face.

Regulus was immediately irritated by him. His mind swam, desperate to get to Wendy and make sure she was okay.

‘You wanted to see me, Headmaster?’ Regulus said, stepping closer.

‘Ah! Mr Black,’ Dumbledore said, turning to him with twinkling eyes. ‘I thought coming down here would allow us a bit of privacy. The portraits in my office can be chatty.’

Regulus’ heart thumped. Phineas Nigellus Black. His rancid ancestor had been Headmaster here at one point. Had he reported his last conversation with Dumbledore to Mother? His portrait hung in one of the guest bedrooms at home. Glancing around the common room, he found no frames on the walls. He’d never noticed that before.

‘I must ask you before we begin,’ Dumbledore went on, seemingly oblivious to Regulus’ turmoil. ‘Do you know where Mr. Crouch has run off to?’

‘No, sir,’ Regulus croaked. ‘He didn’t say.’

‘Ah well, I’m sure he’ll end up where he’s meant to be,’ Dumbledore said, taking a seat and gesturing for Regulus to join him. He did, but only because he thought he might keel over if he didn’t. ‘Have you thought any more about your choices, Regulus?’

‘My choices?’ Regulus said, bewildered, sitting straight in the chair.

‘You seem to be working quite well with Miss Clark. It’s been a pleasant surprise,’ Dumbledore said, blue eyes still twinkling at Regulus. He knew. The bastard knew. Regulus felt his hackles rise.

‘Wen- Miss Clark is easy to work with,’ Regulus said, floundering under the assessing gaze. ‘Is she alright?

‘He told you then? Yes she’s quite alright. In the hospital wing as we speak. You find her easy to speak to, don’t you?’ Dumbledore said enquiringly. Regulus’ mind whirred. This was what the old man wanted. He wanted Regulus to tell Wendy inside information to pass along. Regulus would not put her in such danger. Something shifted in Dumbledore’s eyes as if sensing Regulus’ thought. ‘She is a very capable witch, wouldn’t you say?’

‘She is.’ Regulus said tightly.

‘She may be the perfect person for you to confide in, wouldn’t you say?’

‘Please, Professor, speak plainly. I’m in no mood for riddles.’

‘Very well,’ Dumbledore said, amusement that Regulus did not understand flickering in his face before it turned serious. ‘It has come to my attention that, due to your friendship with Miss Clark, you may be questioning your loyalties.’

‘What of it?’ Regulus asked defensively.

‘Assistance may be provided in exchange for anything you can offer in return.’ Dumbledore said consideredly.

‘You want me to spy?’ Regulus asked incredulously.

‘You have managed to hide your association with Miss Clark thus far. You are a perfect candidate.’ Dumbledore said plainly. ‘Tell me, is it your mother who trained your mind?’

‘Yes. And Bella.’ Regulus ground out, stuffing the memories down.

‘Interesting.’ Dumbledore said pensively. Regulus didn’t see what was so interesting about it. Surely Dumbledore knew why they wanted to hide things from Voldemort.

‘Can it be removed?’ Regulus asked before he could think better of it. Dumbledore’s brows rose, eyes flicking to the sleeve of Regulus’ robes.

‘It is something that is being looked into.’

‘Well, that’s what I want in return.’ Regulus said, pushing himself up. ‘That is my condition for considering your offer.’

He left the Headmaster sitting in the common room and went to see Wendy.

***

The Hospital wing was quiet in stark contrast to the hard beating of his heart in his ears. Pomfrey gave him a knowing look and indicated a curtained off bed. He hurried over to it.

Pulling aside the curtain he found her lying on her side. Her eyes opened slowly, she’d obviously been given something for the pain. His breath came in easier as she reached for him.

He wasted no time sitting beside her and pulling her into his arms.

‘Baby, I’m so sorry. Are you okay?’ he murmured, brushing her hair back.

‘I am now,’ she sighed and snuggled closer. ‘Will you stay?’

‘All night if I have to,’ he said and felt her relax against him. ‘No one will ever hurt you again.’

***

As the term went on, Wendy became increasingly focused on studying for exams. It put a stop to their late-night rendezvous in favour of pouring over texts and practising spellwork.

It had been weeks since he had felt the heat of her, and he was frustrated. Unable to concentrate any longer one evening, he tried to distract her from working by kissing her neck.

She burst into tears. He panicked, apologising immediately.

‘No, Reggie, it’s not you,’ she sniffled, burying her face in his jumper. ‘I’m so stressed with everything going on and exams on top. I feel like I’m losing my mind. There’s not even a point to it. Someone like me will never get a Wizarding job.’

Regulus’ heart sank. The unfairness of someone as bright and clever as her feeling like this hit him in his gut. He held her tightly, soothing her with swipes of his hand on her back and kisses to her crown.

‘Hey,’ he whispered, brushing a tear from her cheek. ‘You’re the cleverest, bravest person I know. I wish I could fix all of this for you, as you deserve. You matter so much, Wendy. Even if the world can’t see it, I do. And I will keep believing in you, even when you can’t.’

She lifted her head to look at him, lips parting. Then she gave him a watery smile.

‘I love you,’ she said, throwing her arms around his neck.

They didn’t go back to studying that night.

***

Regulus was summoned the weekend before exams. He made sure to tell Wendy. She was worried, but he promised that if he didn’t return, he would find a way to get her a message.

The meeting turned out to be a strategic one. He was only included because he would be needed when he finished school.

The plan was straightforward. The Dark Lord wanted control over the Ministry, and they were about to make the final push. Narcissa’s husband, Malfoy, had laid the groundwork with the harsher enforcement of the Werewolf registration. The next step was exposing the real threat—Muggleborns. The Daily Prophet was already being pressured to spread fear about them and Regulus’ stomach turned when they spoke of a register, removal of wands and bans from working Ministry jobs.

When he was told he would be helping Malfoy, his only thought was that he was glad that he could maybe slow the whole thing down somehow.

***

‘No!’ Wendy said defiantly.

‘Please, Wendy!’ Regulus was already begging her to see reason.

‘You mustn’t know me at all if you think I would just abandon you to all of this!’ she said, eyes blazing. It was inconvenient how breathtaking she looked when she was cross.

‘I’m only asking you to stay with your parents! Somewhere you’ll be safe!’ he said, voice cracking.

‘I’ll go if you come with me,’ she said, grabbing his hands and stepping closer.

‘You know I can’t,’ he said miserably, hands tightening around hers. ‘You wouldn’t be safe if I did.’

‘I’m not leaving you,’ she said, wrapping her arms around him. He buried his face in her neck.

‘I need you to be safe.’ he said pained, holding her tighter to him.

‘We’ll take care of each other.’ she said with sturdy conviction. It sparked an idea in him.

***

The Hog's Head was much less reputable than the Three Broomsticks, but it offered the level of privacy Regulus needed for this meeting. Still, he kept his hood up as he waited.

He had chosen a seat in the back, against the wall, with a clear line of sight to the door past the bar.

Twenty-five minutes late, Sirius swaggered in with Lupin, scanned around and took the seats facing Regulus. Sirius fidgeted. Regulus knew it must be hard for him; they had been at odds for so long, so the request for a meeting had probably thrown his brother off.

After a long beat of stilted silence, Lupin said, ‘I’ll get us some pints.’ He rose and went to the bar.

‘You were meant to come alone,’ Regulus hissed.

‘Couldn’t have. Protocol, baby brother,’ Sirius drawled, in contrast to his leg bouncing up and down.

‘Keep your fucking voice down!’ Regulus whispered frantically, eyes darting around the mostly empty pub. Only a pair of grizzly wizards sat at the far end of the bar, and a hag slumped over a table. Sirius dared to look amused. ‘This isn’t a joke.’

‘Then what is it?’ Lupin asked as he set three pints of murky-looking beer on the table and slid back into his seat. Regulus sighed.

‘A mistake.’ Regulus stood, ready to leave. Sirius shot up too, almost knocking the drinks over. Lupin steadied them.

‘No!’ Sirius said, grabbing Regulus and shoving him back down into his seat. ‘We’re here. Just tell us what’s going on. Please?’

Regulus adjusted his robes and made sure his hood still covered his face. Sirius lowered himself back down slowly, still ready to pounce if Regulus tried to leave again. For so long Regulus had wished for Sirius to care about him; now it seemed as if he did. Regulus clenched his jaw and relented.

‘Wendy won’t leave. I told her to go over to Spain with her parents, where it’s safe, but she won’t do it,’ he said wearily. Sirius’ eyebrows rose.

‘You want us to convince her to go?’ Sirius said carefully, leaning forward slightly. ‘I don’t think that’s going to work. She had already agreed to join us.’

‘I know,’ Regulus almost groaned. He had already lost that battle with Wendy. ‘I need help setting up somewhere she’ll be safe, and where I can visit.’

‘You want us to set you up a shag-pad?’ Sirius barked a laugh that seemed forced. Regulus cracked his knuckles, squeezing his hands so tight against his thighs.

‘Sirius, honestly,’ Lupin sighed.

‘You know I can’t take money from the family vaults. When I have control, I can pay you back,’ Regulus said calmly, though he was verging on desperation. He hated asking, but he had been left with no other option. Sirius looked offended.

‘I don’t want your money,’ Sirius said sharply. ‘I’ll give it to you. I’ve more than enough, but I want us to be able to access the place too.’

‘Why?’ Regulus asked incredulously. Sirius exchanged a look with Lupin, who nodded encouragingly.

‘Well, what if something happens and we have to get to her? Or you?’ Sirius said, as if this were obvious. Regulus stared at them for a moment, taken aback.

‘You want to help me protect her?’ He said finally, still in disbelief.

‘Of course we do,’ Sirius said gently, looking like he wanted to say more.

‘Wendy is our friend,’ Lupin added seriously. Sirius nodded and straightened as if trying to reign in his emotions.

‘And if you’re going to be playing both sides for a bit, we’d like to keep an eye on you,’ Sirius said with a wink. ‘For safety, of course.’

Regulus pushed down the urge to throttle his brother and pushed the pint glass away from him, untouched.

‘You’ll help me then?’ Regulus said, businesslike.

‘Charge it to my vault. I’ll approve it when they contact me,’ Sirius said, standing with Lupin. Regulus stood as well. ‘Let us know if you need any help with the wards.’

Regulus extended his hand. Sirius took it with a nervous smile tugging at his lips.

‘Thank you,’ Regulus said, pausing to swallow the lump rising in his throat. ‘Brother.’

Sirius’ face dropped, a fleeting vulnerability crossing it before he schooled it back into his usual smirk.

‘I know I haven't been…’ Sirius said, glancing at Lupin and back. ‘I’m glad you reached out.’

‘Don’t make me regret it.’

***

Once Regulus had organised their safehouse and finished exams, an eerie sense of calm had come over him. He felt in control for the first time in his life.

The night after the final exam, Wendy met him in the Room. She was a little tipsy from the liquor someone had snuck into her common room and eager to get undressed.

As he made love to her amongst the cushions, he felt as though he’d remember this forever. After she fell asleep in his arms, he knew he would love her forever.

***

‘The boy needs some independence, darling.’ Orion Black said, sipping his glass of Ogden’s. Regulus swirled his glass, trying not to look at his mother.

Returning home had been as expectedly horrible as he’d imagined. Except for the fact that his father had organised what he called a ‘pied-à-terre’ for him to live in across London. Not that it mattered. Regulus wouldn’t really be staying there, but it would make it a lot easier to get away. He remained silent and let his parents argue.

‘I lived on my own when I was his age, before our union was organised. And he’s been doing so well.’

‘He should be at home with us!’ his mother said shrilly.

‘I’ll be here all the time for meetings, Mother,’ Regulus said placatingly, desperate to retire for the evening. He finally looked up from his glass and found his mother looking thunderous. She never liked it when things didn’t go her way.

‘See that you are,’ she said venomously and stormed from the room.

Regulus looked back at his father, who looked surprisingly calm despite all of the theatrics. Perhaps he was used to it.

‘Don’t worry, son,’ Orion said. Regulus hid his flinch at the endearment. ‘It’s already settled. She’ll come around.’

Regulus really didn’t know what to make of it.

***

‘Where is this you’ve brought me?’ Wendy asked, looking around at the rolling fields that had come into view after Regulus had apparated them.

‘You’ll see,’ he said with a secret smile, taking her hand to walk her down the gravel path.

The cottage was a rectangular brick structure set in a simple garden surrounded by miles of fields. It was isolated and completely private thanks to the wards he had spent weeks perfecting. She gave him a sideways look as they drew closer.

‘What is this?’ she said as they reached the step.

‘It’s ours,’ he said, pushing the door open. She followed him in, gasping when she saw the spacious living room off the entrance hallway, with exposed wooden beams and floor-to-ceiling bookcases. He had spared no expense filling them for her.

His heart kicked up as he watched her look around. She fit perfectly in the space, just as he’d imagined. It was warm and cosy just like her.

The kitchen was country-style with wooden cabinets, and upstairs there were three bedrooms and an ensuite bathroom with a clawfoot tub.

‘You didn’t have to do this. Your brother said I was welcome to stay with them,’ she said, coming to stand in front of him. He put his hands on her hips.

‘Forgive me if I want you all to myself,’ he said, tugging her forward. Her hands hit his chest and slid up around his neck.

‘You’ll stay here with me?’ she said, biting her lip. He had to force himself to look in her eyes.

‘As much as I can. Hopefully always. The floo is connected to Sirius and Lupin's flat. You can see them whenever you like,’ he said, rewarded with a smile from her. ‘I called the house Neverland. It’s our very own escape.’

‘Regulus,’ she breathed. He felt warmth spread through him at her reaction. Her eyes were sparkling in the afternoon light.

‘Want to see our bedroom?’ he said, grinning. She laughed and jumped into his arms.

‘Show me then.’

***